Tag: Looking back

Life’s Lessons

We all go through life leaning things on a daily basis.  Some of those things are new skills, school lessons and just everyday items.  But, there are those things throughout our lives that make a big impact on us for one reason or another.  Things that maybe we have heard others talk about or maybe have seen played out in someone else’s life but, we ourselves have not fully believed, learned or experienced those things to allow them to impact us in such a way that they become a lesson for us.

Some of the lessons I have learned, some long ago, some more recent, I will list below.

True love is possible.  The kind of love between two people that surpasses all understanding.  The kind of love that creates a bond stronger than chain.  The kind of love that creates more than just a relationship, marriage or union between two people.  It creates a friendship and complete support system for each another.  True love is not just in the fairy tales.  It is REAL!

Common Sense.  This is one that I have realized long ago but, more so on a daily basis.  Common sense in general has been killed off by our society.  All you have to do is read or watch any source of media outlet and you will see what I am talking about.  It seems more and more prevalent that people have lost that thought process or totally choose not to use it and are just out to create drama, get something for themselves or make news headlines for some selfish reason.

Worrying.  We all worry about something everyday.  That is natural.  The thing about worrying is, that if you allow it to consume you,  it can cause other issues.  It can even bring us into a state of depression.  Think about it for a second, what does worrying actually do for the situation?  It does not bring a resolution.  It does not cause the very thing you are worrying about to go away.  It does not make it easier to deal with.  It is simply an emotional state that can cause us to constantly ask why, how or what if in our minds.  I say all this lightly because I struggle with this one as well.  There are ways to deal with this.  We can take a step back, re-evaluate the concern and then focus on the parts that we can physically have an impact on and the other, we have faith that it will work out as it should.  We can seek out help from family or friends.

There will always be something that we can worry about.  Just don’t allow it to consume you.

Patience. We have all heard Patience is a virtue.  I actually wrote a blog on this subject last year (https://wordpress.com/post/risingabove.blog/70). This is another that I have to really focus on daily.  Being patient is difficult, but not impossible.  In reality though, there is little that we can do about the things that we have little patience for.  It really is about US.  A couple of things that test my patience is the going to the grocery store and sitting in traffic.  I cannot control either of those situations.  If I want to get groceries, I either decide to wait patiently in line or I go to another store where I might face the same scenario.  As for traffic, all I can do is wait.  I can’t push others aside so I can get through.  So, it really is about how we deal with the situation.  We can choose to be patient in those times or we choose not too.

Remaining calm.  This one does not need a whole lot said about it.  Remaining calm in the face of confrontation is far better than the opposite.  Reacting harshly will usually have an even more negative impact on the situation, while reacting in a calm, well mannered way will douse the fire.  Whether we find ourselves in these situations at home, work or out in public, the way that we react or respond to situations impacts all those around us.  Think about this the next time you experience a situation where how you react, will determine the way the outcome will go.

 

These are just a few of the things I wanted to mention.  There are many more and I could go on and on with more lessons I have learned.  I hope that this may bring insight to others and maybe even have you jotting down those lessons in your life that have had an impact on you. Whether it be at a young age or older.  It is never too late to learn something new or gain a new perspective.

Until next time…

Reflection

Christmas has come and gone. It is sometimes unreal how quickly an event or holiday tends to come and go. Especially when it is something we really look forward too. This year has been that way for me. We look forward to birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, vacations, etc. Sometimes though our plans get delayed. The events don’t go as we had hoped they would. Vacations get pushed back or cancelled. The list goes on.

Each year so many things happen in our lives. Both for the good and the not so good. The not so good also seem to sneak up on us at times. That is what life is. All these little pieces of a puzzle if you will to make an overall picture.

All these puzzle pieces fit into our lives a certain way. All the things that happen, again, both good and bad, cause us or lead us to take some of the paths we take in our life. Some of these can be successes that lead us to landing our dream job or an opportunity we thought we never had. Others of these cause us to rethink our current directions. They teach us what is important or show us what we have been neglecting.

As this year comes to a close, I would challenge you to take just a few minutes to reflect on what this year has been for you. Reflect on it. Don’t dwell on it. Big difference. Look at your successes, your failures, your struggles and so on. How have they helped you? What have they taught you? Have they changed you for the better or the worse?

Self reflection is a time when you can evaluate where you have been and in what direction you are currently heading.  Have you made progress toward your goals?  Have you made steps in the directions of what you want to accomplish?

As I reflect on this year, I have many things that have helped me become a better me. There have been things that have help me with direction and change. If I look at these things one at a time and dwell on them, it could be not such a pleasant site. When I look at them as a whole, they have given me new insight. They have helped me to look at things with a new perspective. I am progressing in the direction I want to go and things I want to accomplish.  This may only be one small step each day, but it is still a step in that direction.

Now, I am not painting a picture of perfection, I’m just saying that even with the ups and downs of life, there can always be a lesson to be learned. It’s all in how you choose to look at it.

So again, I challenge you to reflect on this year. If it’s been a great year for you, then that’s awesome. Look how you can make it better. How can you help someone else this next year? If it hasn’t been a stellar year, what have you learned from it? How can you apply the lessons and make the improvements or changes for the coming year?

Do you have goals?  Do you have things you want to accomplish?  If so, then start with a plan to make that one small step each day toward that goal or accomplishment.  If not, then I would challenge you to also sit down and write out a few things you would like to do.  They could be personal items, changes, etc.  They could be career related.  What ever they might be, start by writing them down.  When you see them on paper, they become a little more real.

I would love to hear about some of your successes or trials throughout this past year and how you managed all the things in between.

I hope that everyone had a very Merry Christmas and that you will have a blessed new year.

Until next time…

The past

From the moment we are born our history, our past begins. Of course, at that young age and for many years after that we have no idea no knowledge of this. It isn’t until later in life or as we get old enough to begin seeing or thinking about things we did in our past. These could be things that were fun that we did with our friends our families. They could be things we said or things we saw.

And of course, the older we get the more of a past we accumulate. We all have a past. It doesn’t matter whether it is good bad or anywhere in between. It’s there. Our pasts can tell stories. We have heard stories from our grandparents and things they did or saw long ago. These stories can tell us a lot about our family members that came before us. They can show us how we learned to do different things. They can teach us.

The problem with our past is that it can hold us back from our future. I am sure there is at least one thing in each of our past that was not the greatest moment, idea, choice, etc. It doesn’t really matter whether it’s one thing or many, these not so good moments if you will, can keep us from moving forward. There is a common misconception that we (I) tend to believe at times. It is, that our past is what tells us who we are, who we can be or what our remaining life will be like. It is, that our past determines our future.

Yes, our past can tell us many things. It can tell us the mistakes we’ve made. It can show us the bad choices or bad roads we’ve taken. It can bring back many memories, some good, some not so good. The other bad part about our pasts, others around us use our past choices, failures, slips and falls against us. Even long after those things were done. People like to judge others according to their past. This happens in all parts of our lives. They like to bring them up time and time again. This happens with spouses, family members, co-workers, etc.

With all of that said (so much more could be said), there can be a bright side. Just as I stated earlier, our past can teach us many things provided we listen and learn from it. You see, we all make mistakes. We do it every day. At home, at work, at the store. We are human, it is going to happen. Learn from it. Your past doesn’t have to determine your future, unless you are using it to better yourself. Unless you are using it as a change point in your life. It is possible to get past the strongholds of your past. It will take determination. It will take work. But, it is possible.

I am going to go outside of my comfort zone for a minute (Very difficult I might add)

This was a huge struggle for me for many years. Now as I said earlier, we all make mistakes. So, my life was no different. I have had ups and downs just like anyone else. So, with certain choices I made or mistakes I made, failures, etc. I not only had to deal with them myself, I had to deal with things people said. I had to deal with those things being brought back up to me numerous times long after that fact. People had said some pretty hurtful things to me.

With all this, I really struggled to believe in myself. I struggled with my self-worth, my purpose in life. You see, I allowed all the negative things to consume me and basically take over. I didn’t think that I would amount to much. I didn’t feel like I could contribute anything of value in any area of my life.

Here’s the thing, it is possible to overcome those things in your past and even the things people like to say about them. I am so very thankful for all that I have experienced in my life. The good, the bad and everywhere in between. It has taken a long time but, I have used my past as a reflection of where I have been, not of where I am headed. I don’t dwell on it nor on the comments of others regarding it.

So, here is my point, our past is what it is. It will not change. It will always be what it was. The strongholds of our past can be broken. We can learn from it. We can use it as fuel to help us progress into the future. This can be in your personal life, it can be regarding your career, it can be in any area of our lives. The thing to not do is, to hold onto your past. This is true whether it is some success or a failure. Because even holding on to a success you had in the past, will only last for so long before it begins to hinder you from moving forward. Holding onto a failure, allowing it to bring you down emotionally can take a toll on you over time. This again will hinder us from moving forward with our life.
Learn from your past. Take key points from your past and use them as fuel to help you progress. Don’t dwell on the negative too long. Focus on the positive and keep moving forward.

The more time you spend looking back and dwelling on the past, the more you are going to miss the most beautiful thing right in front of you, LIFE.

 ludwigmiesvanderrohe1

 

Life is what YOU make of it. Don’t let others determine that for you.

Until next time…